I feel great
I just peed on a car
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize