arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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