ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize