We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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