last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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