the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
