I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize