I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
