So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Randomize