Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
it was like eating out sand paper
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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