Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
