Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
