what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
