Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
