she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
