HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
