If i come over, it means nothing
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
