Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
