Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
it glows. i had to have it.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
