NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
