I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Drunk is a universal language darling
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