Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
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