I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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