she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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