i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
