When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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