Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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