I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
