let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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