I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
