Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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