Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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