Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
