If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
