They should really pass out barf bags in church
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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