i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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