i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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