butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize