what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
