There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
