butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
