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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
