So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
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