YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
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