Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize