We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Man, jail baloney is awful.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
