Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
