i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
