yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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