I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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