plz talk dirty to me
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
